Suicidal man finds hope

VICTORVILLE • Roche Hope had received calls in the past from suicidal people. But this time, she knew the situation was imminent.

A High Desert man told Hope, a volunteer operator for a 24-hour help line, that he had a gun in his lap, ready to kill himself and his girlfriend if she came home. The man said if Hope couldn’t help him or hung up, that was it.

“You can just hear it in his voice. It was really just eerie,” said Hope, a volunteer for the Victor Valley Community Services Council for more than a year. “At that point, I kind of panicked in my head.”

But Hope kept talking to the suicidal caller, calmed him down and even got permission from him to send law enforcement to help him.

For her accomplishment, potentially saving two lives, Hope was presented with a certificate of recognition by San Bernardino County 1st District Supervisor Brad Mitzelfelt during a VVCSC ceremony Wednesday.

First Call For Help, a phone line answered by VVCSC’s volunteers, refers High Desert residents to various help services in the local area including food banks, domestic violence shelters and a crisis hotline.

“We have to make sure that people know this is not a hotline,” VVCSC Program Administrator Midge Nicosia said. “This is an information service. We’re not trained to counsel. But situations like this, you have to do what you would do as a human being.”

With a year of experience and months of training as a help-line operator, Hope calmly asked the suicidal man why he decided to kill himself.

“He just opened up and just started letting it all out about everything that had been going on in his life and that day,” Hope said.

Hope called a dispatcher and advised the man to lock up his gun and dog so that he would not hurt deputies when they arrived. The man was calmed down by the time officers arrived, Hope said.

Hope credits her supervisor, Shawn Laufer, for managing to get through the dire situation. Laufer had taught Hope not just phone numbers to various social services but also what to do in emergency.

“We can’t really give them too much feedback,” said Laufer, a volunteer coordinator at VVCSC. “But we can listen. And a lot of the people that call the line, they just want somebody to talk to.”

Hope, a Victorville mother of three boys and two girls, said she enjoys volunteering and knowing that she’s helping those who are desperate. She said it’s a humbling experience.

“It just really lets you know it ain’t really no hard days compared to everybody else that struggles,” Hope said.

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